Man it’s tough when things don’t work out as expected!
- Plans get changed unexpectedly.
- A promise is broken by someone you trusted (or did not trust because of past experiences).
- A desired goal is not achieved, though you put your heart and soul into its achievement.
And the painful emotions are just difficult to overcome. Knowing you must carry on actually makes the weight of the disappointment even heavier!
What do you do to get past this feeling many have described as just yucky?
Master Of The Universe
As tough as this point is to accept, you must embrace this reality:
You are not the Master Of The Universe.
You don’t have control over all aspects of your existence. We live in a world full of free-will beings, so others may behave and make decisions that don’t line up with your desires and expectations.
Just as you value your free choice, and will resist any attempts to control your decision making, others share that same value for themselves.
It’s just a basic human trait we all possess.
Influence, Not Control
Though we don’t have the power to control others, we do possess the power to influence. Influence may shape a person’s decisions, but it does not guarantee compliance. We must not confuse the power to influence with the power to control.
The power of influence is best utilized when you have something to offer that the other person desires. If there is no tangible benefit in exchange for what you wanted, there’s an increased chance of a frustrated outcome.
Failure Is Not Final
As tough as the setback may feel, the earth did not fly off its axis. There will be another day and another opportunity to move you forward in life. The next opportunity may or may not be seen right now, but it is coming.
Don’t take this setback as a total loss. See it as another learning experience.
Not a loss but a lesson.
Gain Perspective
There were other “lessons” you’ve experienced in the past. Some remembered. Some forgotten. But you survived and even thrived through them.
This setback will be no different.
Learn the lessons it’s teaching and the setback will be used as wisdom to make your next victorious experience that much more sweeter.
Establish A New Goal
Your thoughts are the seed and root of your emotions. Where your thoughts go, so go your emotions. And where your emotions go, so goes your behavior.
Dwelling on the setback only extends the pain that paralyzes and keeps you from progressing.
If you missed the mark of a desired goal, reset by establishing a new mark and an updated strategy to get there.
If someone disappoints you or breaks a commitment, reevaluate the trustworthiness of their commitment and not place your expectations on their commitments until there’s a solid guarantee of fulfillment.
Point your thoughts on what you want and where you want to go next. With this refocus, your emotions will adjust to the new focus and point your plans and behavior towards achieving that new goal.
You may not be the Master Of The Universe, but you certainly have control over your thoughts and the direction of your life.
Choose to recover from the setback and keep it pushing!
Let Me Know Your Thoughts
Please comment below your thoughts on the blog above. I would love to hear your experience or answer your questions. And other readers would also appreciate your perspective as well.
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